Melody - In Memoriam
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A place to add your memories of Melody. Please sign all entries with four tildes ~~~~
They shall write no code, as we that are left code on:
Blogs shall not follow them, nor the quotedb condemn.
At the crashing of the server and in the booting,
We will renumber them.
(Netizen's Ode of Remembrance, apologies to Laurence Binyon)
188.8.131.52 07:51, 4 February 2014 (EST)
I'm sorry. That seems so inadequate, so meaningless, but it's all I can think to say. You were someone I admired, melody - your intelligence, your desire to see things be right, your honesty. You were at least as sad and cold and tired as I was, and you didn't have any more answers, but I could look at you and see someone who was suffering despite being a beautiful person with far more positive traits and negative. I could look at you and hope that maybe that was me, too.
When I found out you were gone, when I read your obituary and saw no mention of your suffering, it hurt. It felt like a betrayal - not by you, but of you. I felt that we were letting you down, letting you be memorialized in a way that glossed over who you were, made no mention of what you experienced, put you in a context that you resented and struggled against. I will never begrudge you the choice to walk away, if that is in fact what happened. I understand that desire, and I understand that sometimes, that really is the rational choice. I hope for your sake that that's where you were, but I see no reason to second-guess your self-determination. Or self-termination, as the case may be - I like to think you'd look for the humour in this situation, like you did in so many others.
I can't do anything to make your relatives acknowledge who you were, what you felt, what being melody was like. But I flatter myself that I was part of your chosen family, if a small part. And so, melody, I choose to remember you, honor you, love you for yourself, suffering, flaws, and all. I think that's how you'd want it.
We loved, love, and will love you, melody. You are a part of each of us, sharing each victory, defeat, laugh and tear. You were a tragic figure, but you brought beauty into this world.
I can only hope to measure up to the standard you've set.
Happy Birthday, melody. We miss you.