The Internet is a tremendous thing. It can take the most eloquent, poetic statement you can imagine, and make it look like adolescent whining. Not only that, but it performs this operation thousands, if not tens or hundreds of thousands of times every day on a global scale, completely unbeknownst to the authors.
At the same time, being shown cats and babies by the dozen is no longer something to be put up with at the behest of family members. The Internet has elevated the process of thumbing through pictures of cute things; it was once and ordeal, but it is now entertainment. The tubes are veritably clogged with these "Lols Cats."
The Internet is a tremendous thing. But it can't do everything. We can be fooled for the moment by shiny reflection gradients and a veneer of hipness, but at the end of the day, no one cares what you're doing at every moment, and no one actually wants to hear every idle thought that goes through your head. That day will come, and it will be sometime soon . . . but not yet.
Twitter, you are ahead of your time. Your age will not come for a decade. But then . . . then, the world will know that the leftover Pad Thai I had tonight was delicious, if a bit heavy on pea pods. And it will rejoice.
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